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“Dayo, you just have to give birth to your ugly baby”

These are words from my friend Ofunne. Now I am not with child. Also I highly doubt my baby will be ugly. I mean, check out these cheekbones! (I digress.) Ofunne was actually talking about my whispered secret to her that I wanted to write books and lead heart centered discussions.

Now ya’ll may be like, but Dayo! You out here killing it. You have a Marketing Agency, blog, supplement business, and you get to travel and work from wherevaaaaa. Oh SURE! That ish is good. Damn good in fact, but your girl is having a bit of trouble smelling the roses.

See, my “baby” is this dream about writing books and speaking. I want a pretty baby. I want to write a beautiful novel that resonates with millions of people. I want Harvard to call me to speak on their literary panel. I also low-key want to be Oprah, but instead of writing stuff I’m over here thinking Dayo thoughts.

  • I’m not ready.
  • Maybe no one cares what I want to write about.
  • Maybe I’m a shitty writer.
  • I don’t have time to market this thing.
  • What if I’m not creative.
  • How do people even get book deals?
  • Maybe I should just start off small.
  • Damn ain’t no one gonna buy this thing. There’s too much content as it is.
  • Okay, let me wait one year then I’ll do it.
  • I’ll write an easier book first for practice.

Ya know, basic stalling. I have a habit intellectualizing my way out of doing what I really want to do. According to Ofunne, I need to just “BIRTH YO UGLY BABY.”


I do realize the irony here. I encourage and teach people to pursue their business dreams all the ding dong day, but it looks like I may have forgotten what it feels like to be doing ish you ACTUALLY want to do. It’s hard AF. But this encouragement from my friend brings three important thoughts to mind.

You Need Clarity

I guarantee you that your project, blog, or idea will stay constipated if you lack clarity. So, if you don’t know where to start, what you want, who to talk to, or how to focus then this is your first step. Get clear! Easier said than done right? No worries, I got you. I have 5 Day Clarity Challenge that will help you zero in on what you want. You can sign up at

Resistance Is Sexy

Honestly, it was MUCH easier to quit my job, travel, and start this marketing agency when I was broke and sad. Now that I have steady clients and can actually pay these student loans, any move towards a “dream” sounds more and more stupid. Why would I put energy into something that may not make me money? Who cares if I am happy as long as these bills are paid? Let me wait until I make MORE money, then I can think about these things. So for all those in a cushiony 9-5, I know ya’ll are struggling more than most.

The Fear Doesn’t Go Away

If you’re like me and get a little scuuuured at the prospect of starting something new or putting yourself out there. I’ve got some good and bad news. The Bad News: The perfect time will never come and your fear won’t go away. You’re probably like Wha aaa AAT, Dayo? But no, seriously. You’ll intellectualize why you need to buy your website domain next month instead of today. You’ll convince yourself that everyone is doing it and it’s too late. OR you’ll buy hella equipment before recording your podcast. (Points To Self) You’re not smart, you’re scuuured. And that’s okay. That’s the good news. Just know that every justification you have to wait for the perfect time is based on a fear that won’t go away. So don’t let the lack OR presence of fear be your marker to do things. Do it scared. Do it anyway.

Conclusion: Birth Yo Ugly Baby

Also if you’re interested in joining the clarity challenge sign your behind up here. =]

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